I have officially been an election observer in Haiti and Central America. The chance to vote or observe voting is one of the most worthwhile, participatory and caring events in my life. Over 90% of citizens in those countries stand in line all day just to vote – many cannot read/write, but have a ballot with pictures/symbols, etc, so they vote appropriately.  

Dear Neighbor, 

I am relieved the elections are over for now. But, I am also pleased that we have them.  Going into a voting booth may seem insignificant at times, but it is an honor, a privilege and worth standing in line, giving my voice to democracy.  

I have officially been an election observer in Haiti and Central America. The chance to vote or observe voting is one of the most worthwhile, participatory and caring events in my life. Over 90% of citizens in those countries stand in line all day just to vote – many cannot read/write, but have a ballot with pictures/symbols, etc, so they vote appropriately.  

I used to question whether my vote counted enough to stand in line and cast it. I questioned my parents about its worth. When I learned about the electoral college, I thought why should I vote if the state is mostly the other party. My vote really didn’t count. What does my one vote really mean? Why should I think this is really worth all this time and energy? I would hear my neighbors talk about winners and losers, the good and bad, the weak and strong, the conservatives and liberals. And of course I learned many expletives as I learned about the other person, especially if they lost.

Jon Meacham (Vanderbilt University) said it best. Voting is about ‘possibility. It wasn’t really about power – although, it could become that.’  Politicians, when running for office, are trying to tell us what they want to happen. They give us a glimpse of what they think is best. And when the other side wins, we have to decide what to do. What is our ‘possibility’ if we lose? Do we have a ‘possibility?’

We may not like ‘their’ possibility – in fact we probably never will like what the other side says, but it is our collective actions that make healthy possibilities. This is where I find ‘hope.’ Remember when you moved from elementary school to middle school? Of course we came from the best, more intelligent, more athletic school – and they became ‘them.’ We were ‘us’ and therefore we have to be right. Slowly we grew together, still individuals, but as a community. My upper lower class community gave the middle class community something to deal with. And vice versa. And what happened, we survived together. We learned from each other. We gathered knowledge, wisdom and prejudices.

Can this work in our United States community? Even as we seem so divided? Can I truly understand ‘them?’ Am I even willing to put my thoughts and actions forth, or am I just going to sit on the sidelines and cry or laugh because I won or lost? I do not want to dislike ‘them.’

David Myers in ‘Ingroup and Outgroup’ reminds us that favoritism of our group creates a dislike of other groups. And this loyalty to one group could devalue other groups. Do we live in an ‘us vs them’ society? Am I going to continue with my middle school attitude or will I work to continue to fight for what I believe?

I continue to live in this world of inconsistencies, with leadership that often has no character, no ability to make democratic decisions and lead with integrity. But, I didn’t always agree with the other party either. I hope that those in charge aren’t still like me as a child – but have the strength to lead with compassion and concern for all human beings, especially those without. I hope so, because of the possibility of democracy.

“Dear Neighbor” authors are united in a belief that civility and passion can coexist. We believe curiosity and conversation make us a better community.