In this era when Americans are polarized politically and searching for anything that shows that we are still neighbors, saying “Hello” may be a great unifier. Americans of every political persuasion seem to be open to “helloing” at the grocery store, the movie theater, at restaurants and even on the street. Many go so far as to carry on complete conversations with strangers.

Dear Neighbor,

It was a surprise to me that a custom I thought perfectly normal caused confusion in another country. It’s saying hello to perfect strangers. My Lithuanian cousin Algis reprimanded me for saying hello to a couple we passed while hiking in coastal Lithuania. “What was wrong with that?” I asked. “They will spend the rest of the day trying to figure out how they are related to you,” he replied.

After returning to the good ol’ USA, I resumed my habit of speaking to strangers. In the states saying hello, hi, ‘morning or How you doin’ does not seem to cause confusion.

Recently, one of those Facebook reels reminded me of Algis and our coastal encounter. The Mash Report, a satirical British comedy show, reported that a “Northerner,” meaning a Scotsman, had been terrorizing London commuters by walking around saying hello to them. The man was apprehended and apologized: “I didn’t mean to be happy,” he pleaded. The man was not arrested, said a reporter, because “being friendly to strangers

is not a crime in London until next year.” Yes, it was comedy, but several Londoners commented that the gag struck a little too close to home. 

One Brit thought strangers said “Hello” because “they’re a criminal and are trying to distract me whilst someone else robs, mugs or pickpockets me.”

A survey by the travel service Expedia found that among several nationalities, the Japanese were the least likely to talk to strangers on a plane. Their culture values not bothering people and strangers may not want to be spoken to or even helped. That value does not seem to have taken root here.

In this era when Americans are polarized politically and searching for anything that shows that we are still neighbors, saying “Hello” may be a great unifier. Americans of every political persuasion seem to be open to “helloing” at the grocery store, the movie theater, at restaurants and even on the street. Many go so far as to carry on complete conversations with strangers. I wouldn’t be surprised if a dinner invitation or an offer to buy your car followed a chat in the Food Lion parking lot.

For those who have shied away from this uniquely American custom, I urge you to give in  to your inner child and try it. You will not be detained, arrested, reprimanded or forced to apologize for this simple, but powerful greeting.

“Dear Neighbor” authors are united in a belief that civility and passion can coexist. We believe curiosity and conversation make us a better community.